FAIL BLOG 2

Lost in Translation: Given its name, this little hot spot is always hopping!  But only because they have delicious breads and sweets.  It´s actually just a bakery.  The Spanish verb “to bake” is “hornear.”

Body taking a beating:  I´m learning to play squash (a strange derivative of racquetball).  I felt like my arm might fall off after just 3 games to 15 and my cute knee is pictured below.  It´s not a game in which people fall…  I also got eaten alive by mosquitoes in Yaguará and I´m really pale, so my legs are a sight to see.

Before and After: Went to see Millionarios (Colombian team I root for) play Nacional (Colombian team I definitely don´t root for) yesterday.  They were tied for first and had long since been rivals.  Somehow Daniel and I ended up sitting right under the fans who brought fire extinguishers full of colored spray of some sort to shower over the fans and field at the start of the game.  It was pretty cool, but most likely looked much better from afar.  Because of this I had to take two showers in one day and if you know me you know I hate when that happens.

La Lora:  Apparently I like to talk a little bit too much.  I went to the doctor with what I thought was an earache; turns out the joint in my jaw is swollen from talking, screaming, singing, etc to the point that it has affected my inner ear.  I’m supposed to talk and eat less in order for it to heal… ha.

Stairway to Heaven?  Still unsure what this is for.

Hangovers are Fun:  I was feelin’ a little queasy one morning when I made the worst possible decision.  I got on the Transmilenio, a subway-like bus system in Bogota, and ended up smashed between the door and a guy who smelled of sewage.  Imagine my face smashed into his armpit… I puked at the next stop.

Animal Rights Not an Issue:  In a game between Barranquilla's Atletico Junior and Deportivo Pereira (Colombian teams), a small owl, known for flying in and around the stadium fell onto the field.  The game was stopped and a visiting player headed over to help it off the field.  He helped it by kicking it off the field… the owl died a few days later in the animal hospital.  Fans were so upset the striker had to be escorted out of the stadium with the police force.  You have to see it to believe it

.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jyA_yrD1ko

Beautiful Game; Vulgar Hinchada

It is thought by some that soccer (fútbol) is the most popular sport in the world because anyone, despite his/her socioeconomic status can play. All you need is something that rolls (anything from the 2010 World Cup Official Ball going for $132 online to a blown up pigs bladder), two goals (regulation size or two stones to designate the area), and some teammates/opponents (talented peers or just random neighbors, family, and friends). It’s an interesting argument, but I think there’s more to it.

Soccer is a universal language. You’re most certainly better off muting the announcers anyways. The clock keeps running, as in life. If you need time to figure something out, it’s on your own time, you’ve got to do so on the fly. It’s just your body out there, as is: no pads, no rackets, no bats, no helmets. And shin guards do not count as they are currently more to protect the precious shins of young players, the ones professionals use, if any, are about the size of a King of Diamonds. Individual contribution is undeniably important, but acutely insufficient. Points aren’t easily accumulated, no battle easily won. There’s no one strategy, one alignment, one plan of attack. One size does not fit all. There’s room for veterans and rookies. It helps to move fast, but a well-placed pass beats anyone in a race. The good is not rendered meaningless by being equally glorified with the ugly. The fans make sure of that.

Soccer strategy reflects current national philosophy. Take Brazil, hasty progress turned to calculated, sustained development. So are politicians learning from the soccer players or vice versa?

Soccer satisfies our need to have both elegance and chaos. A beautiful game; a vulgar hinchada. The hinchada is the fan base. Beers are not sold in or anywhere within the immediate vicinity of the stadium, you’re not allowed to enter wearing a belt, a police force forms a semi-circle around the player taking the corner kick, and it’s the perfect place to pick up all of your much sought after Spanish swearwords. The fans are brutal to say the least. Even towards their own team. After a rough loss, players leave in a fully armed tank, not a bus. Regardless, soccer fans are the most loyal of all. They jump and sing the entire game, win or lose. There’s zero entertainment. I take that back, the Millionarios (Colombian team I’m currently supporting because I live right by the stadium) has cheerleaders, if you can actually call them that hehe. Next week I’ll make a video; perfect material for the fail blog. My point is, the seats are uncomfortable, there’s no beer, no jumbotron, the sound system is as pathetic as the cheerleaders, and yet, fans focus intently on all 90 minutes of every game. It real life, no frills.

In the words of Phil Woosnam, a once well-known Welsh soccer player and manager, “the rules of soccer are very simple, basically it is this: if it moves kick it. If it doesn’t move, kick it until it does.”